Recovering from a Wipeout! Part I
9 How is your beloved better than others,
most beautiful of women?
How is your beloved better than others,
that you so charge us?” Song of Songs 5:9 NIV
In the last two devotions we saw how Solomon and Shulamith had to deal with conflict. While all marriages WILL deal with conflict, it is important to know that the more we grow in our relationship with God, the less conflict we should have because we are “becoming” one. Here we pick up right after the conflict of Solomon and Shulamith and we see how they are to recover from the wipeout.
The friends of Shulamith question her about her beloved.
“9 How is your beloved better than others,
most beautiful of women?” Song of Songs 5:9 NIV
They are asking, “What’s so special about him?” Now at this point, it would be easy, and normal for a wife to begin to complain about her husband. He is lazy. He just watches sports on tv. He doesn’t do enough around the house. He doesn’t put the toilet seat down. He doesn’t bring home enough money. He spends too much time golfing. He doesn’t help with the kids enough. What’s so special about him?
If we remember what we learned from this book previously, we recall, “Marriages are not successful because we make the right promises or have the right intentions. They are successful because we do the right things… even if it is hard to do.”
Shulamith is not given to speaking death or sarcasm about her husband. She is devoted to doing the right thing… even if it is hard to do. This, by the way, is an area I am trying to improve in personally. I tend to be sarcastic and believe the Lord is working on changing my tongue to speak life more frequently. Husbands who read this should be reminded that we can learn to speak life to our wives as well.
Let’s see how Shulamith speaks about her husband. In this devotion we will see what a wife should say about her husband. In the next devotion, we will see what Solomon says about his wife.
1 – You stand out from other men
10 My beloved is radiant and ruddy,
outstanding among ten thousand.
Shulamith points out that her husband stands out from other men. She points out how special he is to her. She speaks to her husband in such a way to build him up. She makes him feel special. By the way, wives, the woman who makes a man feel most special in his life, should be his wife.
2 – I appreciate your intellect and gifts.
11 His head is purest gold;
his hair is wavy
and black as a raven.
Here she speaks of his intellect and gifts. She speaks life about who he is. She points out his strengths to him. She recognizes where he is strong and tells him about it. Wives, do you point out to your husband the areas that he is strong in and what you love about him?
3 – I love the way you look.
12 His eyes are like doves
by the water streams,
washed in milk,
mounted like jewels.
13 His cheeks are like beds of spice
His lips are like lilies
dripping with myrrh.
14 His arms are rods of gold
set with topaz.
His body is like polished ivory
decorated with lapis lazuli.
15 His legs are pillars of marble
set on bases of pure gold.
His appearance is like Lebanon,
choice as its cedars.
What husband would not want to hear that his wife likes the way he looks? A husband should hear how much his wife loves his looks, far more than how much other women appreciate his looks.
4 – You are not just my lover, but also my best friend.
16 His mouth is sweetness itself;
he is altogether lovely.
This is my beloved, this is my friend,
daughters of Jerusalem.”
Wives, your husband may not deserve to hear all of the compliments that are listed here. Don’t speak to who he may be now, but to the man that you know he can be. Speak to his potential and to the man God created him to become. When God called us… all of us… He called not according to how great we were, but according to His love for us.
Holy Spirit empower husbands and wives to speak life to their spouses. Fill and change marriages through Your Word. Amen.